Bishop's letters: December 03 +Graham : Christmas is a time to forgive

What would the world be like without forgiveness? The Chief Rabbi, Jonathan Sacks, gives us a clue.

He writes:

'We need forgiveness. It's what helps us sustain relationships, build marriages that last, stay close to our children and faithful to our friends. We say things that hurt and do things that harm. So do others to us. The mere fact that we can apologise and be forgiven is one of the most blessed gifts of humanity, and it isn't simple at all. It is underwritten by a certain view of the universe, the belief that God forgives'.

To leave God out of the reckoning is to throw out forgiveness as well. Forgiveness is at the heart of how God deals with us and that is what supports forgiveness in the world of day to day conflicts. Without forgiveness relationships break down, attitudes harden and we are unable to rebuild.

Forgiveness is God's way of putting right the wrongs in the world. It is the only way that works. Without his forgiveness we can spend a lifetime trying to do enough good to balance the wrong we have done. Or else we simply shrug off any idea of accountability for our lives. That is not the way to inner peace. We need forgiveness. Yet we cannot simply forgive ourselves; someone bigger than us must do it. And when God forgives, that is the end of the matter with him.

Many people in our society are foolishly trying to live in a self-sufficient way, without God or Jesus. So when things go wrong there is no other way than despair of ourselves or blaming someone else for what has happened. We are becoming a culture of blame and compensation. It is far better, first to let God forgive and help us, and then to follow his way and be forgiving of others.

Even worshipping in our churches there are those who hold grudges, sometimes going back many years. In churches with only a few key families, 'bad blood' between families can cut right into the life of the church, driving away the Holy Spirit who calls us to the ways of Christ. We must learn to forgive as God forgives us. Refusal to forgive leaves an unforgiving spirit in us. This, in turn, may affect our bodies with pain and sickness. It is better to forgive and be reconciled.

Christmas time is a time for relating to our families. For some this year it could be a time of forgiving and rebuilding relationships that are strained or lost. Could it be the time to write a letter or make a phone call to heal a broken relationship? Saying 'sorry' for our part is one of the most healing things we can ever do.

The name 'Jesus' means one who saves. He came to earth to be our sin bearer and to make it possible for God to forgive us. Let us celebrate his coming this year by laying aside our feuds and enmities and, instead, forgiving. It will truly make a 'Happy Christmas'.

Graham Dow – Bishop of Carlisle